Am I just using him – chapter 2


I’m watching some tv when Milan wakes up. He has been asleep for thirty minutes or so. He looks sleepy and at first he has to look around in order to know where he was. Then he notices me and smiles. He sits up and yawns.

“Hey,” he says.

“Hey dude. Did you sleep well?”

He laughs. “Yeah. Sorry, I didn’t mean to fall asleep.”

“No problem man, no problem. I wanted to give you a blanket, but…” I stop and smirk. “Didn’t want to get the blanket all filthy… you know?”

He looks at his bare chest. “Oh shit. I’m sorry.”

“Hey, don’t sweat it. You enjoyed yourself, that’s cool.”

“I should get cleaned up. What time is it?”

I glance at my watch. “Half past ten.”

“O, shit. Should get going soon then.”

I get up from the comfy chair I had been sitting in all this time and sit down next to him. He smells like horny teenager and I feel my dick twitch in my pants. “You could spend the night man. Not sure where you live and it’s dark outside.”

He smiles. “It’s no problem, really. I live fairly close anyway, and my parents would want to know where I am. Besides, we should keep the sleepovers for the second date, don’t you think?” He looks dead serious. My face must’ve been very funny, because suddenly Milan bursts out in laughter. “I’m just joking with you man. I know exactly where we’re at, no worries.” He smiles. “So, are you gonna point me to the bathroom so I can make myself unsticky again?”

I laugh awkwardly. Tables have turned, apparently, I think. All of a sudden I’m the shy and uncertain one while he is fully in control. “Follow me,” I say. Only now I notice he is half hard again. I show him the bathroom and I demonstrate how the shower works.

“You can join me, you know?” Milan says. “You must be all sweaty too.”

“No, I’m fine.”

He raises an eyebrow. “You sure? I can take care of you again, if you want? You surely must be horny again, having this naked beauty in front of you.” He laughs and I don’t know what to say. I can feel my dick growing. “For real though. Could be fun.”

I keep silent. In the corner of my eye I see he is even getting harder again as he is absently rubbing.

“Think about it. You can join later if you want.” He turns the shower on and gets in.

I am perplexed. Am I even considering getting in there with him? Two naked guys showering together. How gay can it get? But… He was right, I am hard and horny. And he offered to make me cum again. You know what, today has been weird anyway. Let’s fucking do this, I want me in his mouth again. I quickly undress and step into the shower.

Milan doesn’t look too surprised. “There he is.” He smiles. He smells my armpit very shortly. “I knew you were sweaty.”

“Well, it was hard working earlier today.” I grin.

The boy takes some shampoo and starts washing my hair. Okay? What should I think of this? I’m not doing anything to him, right? So it’s not gay to be in this situation. It actually feels kind of nice to have him massaging my back. His hands slide to my lower back and again, he spends some time caressing and massaging. I got a boner in the meantime, obviously. His hands move up again, and he massages my shoulders a few seconds before he starts soaping in my chest. During a few seconds, he massages my nipples, which is extraordinarily sensitive. Along my belly button he traces a trail of soap towards my pubes. He caresses my balls and intentionally avoids my dick. My aching to be caressed dick.

Out of a sudden he hugs me from behind, causing his whole body to touch me. His dick, obviously, touches my butt crack. At the same time, he grabs hold of my dick and starts jerking me off from behind. I just wanted to start protesting, I didn’t want him to be so close to me, I don’t want any cock touching me. Ever. Period. But, it just feels so good to have him jerking me off while I can’t see him. The hot water is still crashing down on us.

Milan takes some more soap and makes sure it all foams before he continues jerking me off with his foamy hand. His left hand is still caressing my nipples, my chest and sometimes he even touches part of my face. At first I felt uncomfortable with that, but once again, the hand job was just too great, so I couldn’t really protest. I guess I was too busy trying not to faint to really complain or anything. Finally he makes a step backwards, getting some space between him and me, and finally having his dick not touching my ass. But, apparently he did this for a reason, as he – without a warning – suddenly puts a finger in my asshole. I jump away from him. “What the fuck man.”

He looks confused. “I thought you wanted me to make you cum. You know, like you never have before?”

“Yeah, but stay away from my ass. That’s gay man.” I realise what I said. “I mean… I got no problems with that, but I’m just not like that, you know?”

“Yes, I told you already. I know. But, did you ever try this? It really makes your orgasm like a million times better!”

I frown.

“Do you trust me, Dan?” he asks.

I sincerely think about that question. I guess I do, but I often trust people way too soon, which has a way of backfiring. “I guess.”

“Then let me make this moment even better.” He smiles. “It really isn’t gay or anything, it’s just to stimulate your prostate. Trust me.”

I hesitate. “Okay, but if I want you to stop, listen. Alright?”

“Alrighty,” he says happily.

I turn my back to him again and Milan takes another drop of shampoo. Ankara escort Once again he starts jerking me off. This time, when he pushes his thumb into my crack, I do not scare away. It feels weird at first, but at some point I get used to it. I wouldn’t say it necessarily felt great, but it’s okay. I’m getting pretty hyped up with him stroking my dick and his fingers in my butt, so I soon start moaning. Milan keeps touching my prostate in between strokes, which started to feel like a rhythm I was getting used to.

“You like this, don’t you?” the boy whispers in my ear.

Hnngh. “Yeah…” I moan. “I do.”

“You better.” He speeds up and softly nibbles on my earlobe, but I don’t really register that, I’m too focused on postponing my orgasm. At some point I don’t really manage to do that, so I let it all go. Milan was right, this must be even more cum than earlier today. Holy shit. It is literally everywhere, on his hand, on the shower curtains, on the bottles with shampoo on the floor. “Oh damn, that was so hot,” Milan says. When I turn back to him, I notice he was licking my cum off his hands. “I too am happy I had to borrow that dictionary.” He laughs.

I make sure the water washes away all cum and I get out of the shower while Milan starts cleaning up himself. I dry my body and when I’m dressing up again, he just started toweling his body. Just before I want to leave the bathroom, he bends over to dry his feet, exposing his pink butthole to me. I can’t stop staring at it and I automatically try to imagine what it must have looked like from his point of view to finger me while jerking me off. I’m starting to really like this arrangement. He is like my fuckbuddy now. Lovely!

I walk downstairs and Milan joins me a few minutes later. “I should go home now, I guess.”

I nod. “Thank you, Milan.” I smile. “I had fun today.”

His smile is huge. “Me too.” He gives a hug and then walks away. Without even looking back he leaves the house. I’m home alone again.

What the fuck happened today?


During the next few days I realise I actually know nothing about Milan. I know he’s only in the second year, meaning he is probably a year younger than me. I don’t have his phone number, don’t know in what classes he is and I don’t know where he lives. I didn’t see him in school over these next few days either. My mind kept wandering off to him and that day. I want to see him again. I want him to give me a blowjob again. I want him to fall asleep naked on the couch.

I really really want to feel loved for once.

But he is nowhere. So, I just went back to being the old me. The popular guy with a lot of friends. The straight guy! I cut the video files from my dads server onto my own laptop and of course, I shouldn’t have to tell you, I watched them back a few times. Sometimes it got me horny, so I’d jerk off watching it, but sometimes it’d make me disgusted too. That was a gay boy that sucked my dick. I just don’t know what to think of it, you know? But, it really feels good, not just physically, of course that feels good, but also the emotional part. I feel safe with him and really like having him around. Well, I did anyway, I’m not sure anymore.

I stayed in doubt like this for over two weeks, during which I saw a glance of Milan only once. But then, after two weeks, I find a note in my locker.

“If you’re ever home alone again, be sure to send me a text on 00316539232011.”

I look at the note. It has a little smiley on it, but no name. It doesn’t need one of course, it can’t be anyone else. That whole day I’m happy. People even notice it and ask why I’m so sunny, but I can’t tell them. I’m going to have sex again! That is why I’m happy, right?

Only one hour later I send a message. “Hey. Milan, right? How are you, haven’t heard from you for so long.”

Within that minute I get the response: “Yes, it’s Milan. I thought you had to ‘recharge’ hehe.”

“Well. I guess I’m fully recharged now. Unfortunately, my parents will be home this week.”

“No luck for you then.”

I stare at the message. What did I expect? Of course I need them to be away. And I can’t be disappointed he isn’t really looking forward to it or anything. It is one way traffic of course. But still, I feel hurt or something. What is this?


“Honey, your dad and I decided we want to take the next weekend off, if that’s okay with you?”

I look up from the homework I’ve been doing. Did I register that correctly? “Oh, where are you going?”

My mother smiles. “We don’t know yet. Probably up north. But, do you mind being alone for a weekend?”

I won’t be alone, I think. “I’ll be okay. Have fun!”

“We will. Thank you, Dan.”

I turn my attention to my homework again, but I can’t really concentrate. So I take my phone out of my pocket and send a message to Milan. “Took some time, but I will be home alone all weekend.”

Then I try to really concentrate, but I keep glancing at my phone. No reply. It’s almost eleven o’clock in the evening when finally he replies. “You’ll see me then. Do you have an extra bed, or should I sleep on the couch?”

Jesus, he is going to sleep over? Didn’t expect that, but you won’t hear me complain! This weekend is going to be so much fun. I tell him I have a place for him to sleep, so everything will be alright.

Needless to say I couldn’t wait for the weekend. I was nervous and horny for days. When it’s finally friday, and my parents left, I am just skipping Ankara escort bayan around the house with a hardon. This guy is going to suck my dick today! O god, I’m really ready for it.

I guess he doesn’t show up on purpose. Just to show me his power and my desperate craving for his mouth. It’s eleven p.m. when he finally shows up. I open the door with a huge smile.

“Hi,” he says, just as awkwardly as before our last experiences.

“Hey, come in. I’ve been waiting for you.”

He smiles and brushes away some of the hair that was in front of his eyes. “I bet.”

I grab his hand and pull him in. I close the door behind him. “You want a drink?” I ask.

“I’d like a beer. I need some of that Dutch courage before I can satisfy your “needs” again.”

I laugh. “I don’t believe you’d need a drink for that.”

“No, you’re right. I’d suck anyone’s dick, I guess.” He looks at me as if he expects a reaction. I have to admit, for some reason it kind of hurt hearing him say it. But I’m not going to show that, of course. He can do whatever he likes. But I do want to invest in him as friends, not only as a fuck buddy, I decide right now.

“Well, I’m more than just a dick to suck.” I guide the boy to the kitchen and open the fridge.

Milan takes the beer I offer him and opens it. “Oh, what are you then?” He takes a sip.

I grab myself a beer as well. “I guess I can be a fun guy. Like, I can talk and listen, I can do games or whatever.”

He grins. “But you won’t jerk me off.” He fakes a sad smile.


“Yeah, I know. I’m just joking, bro. It’s no problem, really. I have to train so I’m not a total rookie when I finally get a boyfriend.”

I laugh, but it’s a clumsy one. “Yes. And I have to practice too.”

Milan walks to the living room and I follow him. “Sure, you have to practice getting a blowjob.” We sit down on the couch.

“Well… uhh. I mean… I have to practice not cumming immediately when a hot… uhh… when something hot happens. I guess.”

“Dan, you can train that with just your hand and some tissues too.”

I take a big gulp of my beer. “You know…”

“I get it. You just want to get off. And I’m a slutty fag who wants to help you out. Who actually craves for that cock of yours. It’s okay.”

“Is it only that?”

He looks at me confused. “Is it only what? Is there more than that, you mean? Well, I did like you, I thought you were cute.”

“No no, I don’t mean that. You’re a cool dude, I’m wondering if it’s only sex or if we’re also, you know, friends?”

Milan smiles. “Not sure if that works, being friends and having this arrangement, as you called it.”

I turn red. “I was tipsy, I never meant it like that.”

“Well, I’m happy you did. I would’ve never just started undressing you. About that, why are you still wearing all your clothes?”

Wow, that is to the point, he only just got here. “I thought it would be a little inappropriate to immediately put my boner in you mouth.” I grin.

“That is the goal of tonight, isn’t it?”

“Not necessarily. It could be like, you know, a side goal? We can also play some games and watch a movie.”

Milan laughs. “This is looking an awfully lot like a date or something.”

“Friends play video games,” I parry his “insult”.

Milan lays his hand on my groin and starts massaging. “Friends don’t do this.”

I relax for a second and I lay back. “Hmmm.”

“You like that, horny boy?”


“Guess we’re gonna have so much fun this weekend.” He grins.

“Wait, you’re staying the whole weekend?”

“Of course!”

It’s my turn to grin. “I guess I like that. What are we waiting for, let’s get undressed!”

Milan frowns. “Me too?”

“Of course, silly. I’ve seen you naked, remember? No need to hide behind clothes.”

Milan jumps up and stand real close to me, just like last time, only now he’s even closer. I could touch his pants with my nose if I bent forward, that close. He makes a clumsy pirouette and takes off his shirt. “Take a good look at this sexy body,” he says with a goofy smile. “I bet you’re going to grow fond of it!”

I laugh. “You wish!”

Another pirouette and in one motion he gets rid of his trousers and underwear. He is rock hard and as I said, he is even closer to me this time, so I could probably reach his dick with my tongue if I tried. But of course I don’t try, that’d be gay. Milan starts stroking his dick. I stare at his foreskin going up and down. I gulp.

“My turn,” I say to change the course of this moment and I jump up. My hand accidentally touches his dick. “Oops, sorry.”

Milan grins. “No problem. No… problem… at all…”

I turn red. “Stop it, you goofball. Now sit down!” I push him gently on the couch. He falls forward, revealing his round buttcheeks again. Laughing he turns around and looks at me expectantly, while constantly stroking his dick.

I take off my shirt without doing a pirouette. Then, as sensually as I can, I slowly push my trousers down. I step out of them and reveal my dick through the leg of my boxer, just like I’ve seen in some porn. Milan giggles. As he’s lying on the couch, I get on top of him, with my legs at both his sides and my dick, still covered in my boxers, right above his face. A wet spot marks my glans. I gradually lower myself until my balls are touching his lips through the fabric of my underwear.

“Hmm,” Milan says and licks them. “Blehh, Escort Ankara not really. Too clothy.”

I laugh and quickly pull my boxers down, which was a good idea in my head, but as my legs were spread, I couldn’t pull them down. Instead, I tumble over, causing both me and Milan to crack up. “Very sexy,” Milan manages to say in between his laughs.

We start wrestling a little bit, just in a friendly manner. Sure, I probably touched his dick a few times accidentally, but that’s all part of the game. Nothing too gay about it. We end up with me sitting on the couch and him on kneeling on the ground with his head between my legs. He is quietly slurping at my dick and I have my eyes closed, just enjoying the great sensation. It feels like he even became better at in the meantime!

When I open my eyes, I grant myself a single glance at the boy, who is – as expected – looking at me. I smile, to which he tries to smile back. At least, it looks like it, it’s hard to see with a cock in his mouth. He starts fumbling with my balls and I look around in the room. Then I notice a silver thing in the pocket of the trousers of Milan. I try to deduce what it could be, as it really stands out.

It takes me a minute of enjoying the warm wet mouth around my member to realise what it is. While moaning, I manage to ask: “is that a… a condom?”

Milan stops and looks at his trousers. He grins. “Yeah. I guessed maybe… you know… I have to practice, remember?” The sly smile again.

“I told you I’m not…”

“It’s not gay, man.”

I notice he is absently stroking his dick.

“It’s just like pussy. Some even say it’s better, as it’s tighter.”

I think about it. “I don’t know, Milan.”

“You know you’ll like it.”

I grin. “Probably. But I’m really not sure about it.”

Milan looks disappointed and grabs my sticky dick. Absently, probably overthinking it, he strokes it. Then he looks at it and a mischievous smile appears on his face. “I can blackmail you.” He releases me and demonstratively sits down next to me.

“You’re really going to do this?”

He nods confidently.

Completely naked, both with boners, we just sit there on the couch. I don’t want to give in, but I really want him to finish it. With a stern expression on my face I state: “then I want you to leave.”

For a second Milan believes me, but when he notices my smile, he starts smiling again. He leans in again and takes me in his mouth. He starts moving up and down furiously, almost as if he wants this to be over with. I put my hands on his head and thrust my hips with every movement. I’m quite literally fucking his head now. Hnngg, oompfh. I’m not why, but I’m close already. “Milan,” I moan. Hmmpf. “I’m close man.”

He slows down and looks up at me. For a second he leaves my wet dick behind in the cold outside world. “We don’t want that, do we.”

I move my dick towards his head and he graciously takes it in. “Not being in your mouth is cold,” I laugh.

He smiles and continues going wild on it. He really got better since last time. His tongue is swirling circles around the tip, his right hand is on the base of the shaft as he can’t really take it in whole. His left hand is massaging my balls at the same time. I bet if he had a third hand, it’d be in my ass. I think I’d kinda like that… It really did feel good last time. Maybe I can even get it why he wants me to fuck his ass. And he is a little right, I guess, it’d just be like fucking a girl. Only now he gets something in return. Is it selfish of me not to want that?

Milan paces up again, probably noticing I’m close. I can literally feels my balls cramping as I try to hold it in. I can’t anymore, a little moan from Milan pushes me over the edge. And again, he swallows it all. I lay back panting and with my eyes closed. I barely notice Milan is still licking my balls and caressing my chest and nipples. I don’t really care about it, I’m just happy he leaves my sore dick alone. I just relax and enjoy the attention.

“A whole weekend,” I sigh.

“So much fun,” Milan replies. “Talking about fun, I think I’m going to take a shower to take care of myself. Don’t want to make a mess again.”

I open my eyes. Milan is standing in front of me and is stroking his dick, which is already covered in precum. “Enjoy yourself,” I say with a smile.

“Oh, I’m sure I will. I have enough mental images to last me a lifetime.”

I blush. “I bet.”

When Milan is gone I turn on the television and watch a stupid show about houses. I don’t really pay attention, I’m too busy feeling content. A whole weekend of fun. Who wouldn’t want that? And all of this just because of dictionary! Twenty minutes later the boy appears from the shower again. At this time I’m just relaxing on the couch, you know, between sitting on it and lying on it. I have my arms spread out along the back of the piece of furniture. Milan is still naked and this must be the first time I’ve seen him with a soft dick. He is quite the appearance. I can only feel jealousy towards his future boyfriend. I know, that sounds exaggerated, but for real, he almost makes you wish you were gay.

“What are we watching?” he asks.

I shrug. “Not sure.”

He laughs. “Sounds like fun.” He sits down next to me, really close, and snuggles up even closer. He lays his head down on my shoulder. I let him, even though this is a little closer than I’d like him to be, I guess it’s the least I can give back to him. And, there is always this thing in me that likes the attention, that likes warmth. About ten minutes later I hear a cute snoring sound. I carefully turn my head. He fell asleep. I smile and zap.

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